"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
