Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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