In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
