At least make sure they are 18
Why
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize