I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
