Only a mothe r could love this liver
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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