Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
