i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
