so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
