i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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