Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
