Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
