FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Shitshow foam night was such a success
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize