You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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