I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize