At least make sure they are 18
Why
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
