Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
