does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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