chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
