Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
