Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize