Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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