i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
