Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
