apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
