Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
