He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
