We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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