ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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