PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
