Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize