I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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