do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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