Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
