I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
