butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize