WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
