I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
