stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
