I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize