yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
