Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
