Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
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