he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
