4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
