I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize