At least make sure they are 18
Why
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize