She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize
