We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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