when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize